LESS THAN 200 HOURS TO GO …… YIPEEEEEE

The fans are definitely getting excited and the natives restless here in SAAKland, the countdown shrine clock has passed the 200 hours left mark and it still counts … it is still counting ….. hooray!

Sorry, unnecessary burst of emotion there, it willn’t happen again, well maybe at the 100 hour mark.

This was not for you ..

With but two weeks to go, or as the countdown clock reads 346 hours (of which 96 is weekend and many, many are pub hours) left in this abomination they call Sydney, the worries are starting to creep into SAAK's phyche.

SAAK is somewhat sad that he is not sad leaving this city, he does tend to bad mouth her a little, that’s probably because we never got to know each other, or more likely and more closely resembling real life, she is too good from him and they both know it.

SAAK knows that leaving is probably the right thing, the job is in a hellish environment, with the bosses wife seeming less sane every day … today we got from her “I fucking hate Christmas … it’s all about stuff … I don’t get stuff … so my kids won’t get stuff..” coupled with “my kids are so unfortunate…. They have me as a mother” (neer a truer word spoken).

But along with realising that moving is probably the right thing, SAAK is also concerned about spending time with his family. For a while at least, SAAK is moving to the small country town where his parents and two sisters live…. This is worrisome, SAAK has never lived in a small town like this before, he grew up in Canberra, went to University in Wollongong and has been in Sydney ever since.

SAAK has also not spent more than two weeks at any one time with his family since he was eighteen, they don’t actually know him and buggered if he knows them … that having been said, this move does seem to present an opportunity to re-invent SAAK, leave the old version behind for the vermin to gnaw at.

Perhaps SAAK could be a little less introverted, self absorbed and sad …. go out, meet some people and smile some … that does sound tempting……

Things you should know

Steph’s meme

SAAK initally rejected his tag knowing full well that he is a particularly uninteresting individual. But a) after being yelled at b) because it’s something he would not normally do, and c) for fear of being slapped upside the head with a phone book, here goes SAAK's Things You Should Know.

(Just before I start, if you do read this, you will not be entitled to get the ensuing 4 minutes of your life back)

. Better quality to have. Good kisser or good conversationalist

Conversationalist, no question, there is nothing SAAK enjoys more than a good argument with an intelligent person who can hold up one side of the conversation. We willn’t mention the fact that sane people tend not to voluntarily kiss SAAK (he’s not a particularly pretty person)

Last time you cried?-

Sadly and honestly SAAK has no recollection of crying, not necessarily just because he is a boy, partly, but not wholly. I’m sure he cried at his grandfathers funeral when carrying the coffin, just no memory of it.

How old do you wish you were?

That is an interesting one, SAAK, whilst being chronologically 30, is emotionally probably only 15, but feels every day of 40. Having said that, SAAK does not really “wish” to be any age, but would like to have another crack at being a teenager, really, really ballsed that one up.

What's your real life nickname

Again, somewhat sadly, outside of the occasional (insert surname here)ey and ”Oy, you, yes you, the git in the corner on his pat” no nicknames.

How often do you talk to your mum

SAAK’s mom calls once a week. 7.30 Sunday, the conversation is exactly the same every time and lasts about 2 - 3 minutes not really sure why she does it, SAAK never has anything of any real interest to say, but hey, she seems to like it.

When is the last time someone gave you a dirty look

SAAK is generally oblivious to body language. He’s more likely to walk on by than notice someone giving him an evil look. Besides, he is nothing but cordial all the time, no need for anyone to give dirty looks.

If someone accidentally spits on you while talking do you acknowledge it or ignore it

Well, I’d like to think SAAK would say something particularly witty like “say it, don’t spray if” (I joke). But certainly, you could not let a moment like that just pass without some comment, surely.

Eternal love or endless money supply

SAAK, being the practical personal he is has to say endless money. Throw away lines like “money can’t buy happiness, but it can purchase a close substitute” come to mind. But honestly, I’m not sure SAAK holds any hope for the other option…. (sad I know)

If you were guaranteed that you would succeed, what is the one thing you would do

Live life

11. Finish these sentences;A) Sex on the first date is.....
Hang on a minute here …. That’s jumping the gun a little, a first date of any description would be some kind of god sent one in a million miracle, so we’ll leave it at that


B) On Saturday night I like to....
Drink SAAK into a stupor, but that’s not greatly different to most other days that end in “y”

C) I try to avoid.....
Stupid people, well people in generally, but that is a habit SAAK is trying to remedy (the people in general thing, SAAK still wants to avoid the idiocy of the great unwashed).


D) My childhood dream was..
Honestly, no idea. SAAK’s memory for some strange reason does not seem to kick in until age of 16-17, even then it’s a bit blurry. I am, however pretty darn certain, what every the dream was, it was not the life SAAK ended up with.

E) I secretly envy....
Those people who are smarter that I am. Those people who can just meet people. Those people who have people that love them voluntarily and unconditionally and of course you.


Well there you go. I did previously warn you that you will not get those four minute of your life back, don’t blame me.

Limbo – Just more Self indulgent shite …

SAAK has an excel sheet on his desktop with a count down clock, it reads 590 hours left in old Sydney town. But then what, there is no doubt in SAAK’s mind that he detests being in this town, but what if that is because he is in this town. What if, when he moves to the next place SAAK is still there?

Is it just Sydney, is it just the job, could it just be that SAAK has been lonely for a decade … there is family where he is going, will that help, or, alternatively is it just as likely to alienate him further .. it is not as though they know him .. they’ve only seen him two to three times a year for the past decade…. and rarely does the real SAAK come along (who ever that is).

Wow, what a self indulgent piece of absolut, (actually Stolichnaya inspired), clap trap that was. I hope, in the sober light of day, this does not pass the editor’s desk.

SAAK out

Could I be less productive?

With this whole “I’ve quit, just let me the fuck out” attitude that seems to have taken over my existence, today has been a complete write off. All SAAK has done during this day is read blogs and keep an eye on the cricket score.

As an aside, SAAK has perfected an ALT TAB system in his head where, if nothing important is going on SAAK will read blogs, but look sufficiently busy, as soon as something needs to be done, *ALT TAB* back on the ball. (If it is at all possible to avoid the excessive use of bright colours on blogs that would be great, they don’t look like work related sites).

(Hope the subtle irony of spending the time writing about ruing the time wasting is not completely lost.)

Weekend afoot ….. hope it goes well for all, if you are enjoying your weekend, spare a quite thought for SAAK who enters his second weekend of drinking without smoking .. not conducive to the happy making.